“Trauma is stored in the body, and time alone cannot heal it.” – Bessel van der Kolk
Dr. Bessel van der Kolk’s The Body Keeps the Score has been a transformative resource on my healing journey, offering profound insights into how trauma imprints itself not just on our minds but also within our bodies. Trauma isn’t just a memory—it’s a pattern of physical responses and emotions that continue to shape our daily lives. Understanding this connection between body and mind has been a cornerstone of my journey and the work I now offer to others.
How Trauma Manifests in the Body
Van der Kolk’s research highlights that trauma is imprinted on the nervous system, akin to muscle memory. Even when our conscious mind has moved on, the body often retains these imprints, manifesting as chronic tension, sudden surges of anxiety, or a persistent sense of unease. This physiological response becomes a form of conditioning, trapping us in reactive patterns shaped by past experiences.
In my own life, I’ve repeatedly experienced how shame and anxiety feel like my body “taking over,” even when my mind tries to remain calm. These moments often surfaced as physical sensations—tightness in my chest or a clenched jaw—reflecting unprocessed feelings stored within.
My Journey from Disconnection to Awareness
When I began therapy four years ago, I started uncovering just how disconnected I was from my body. I lived almost entirely in my head, repressing emotions without even realizing it. This disconnection had its roots in early experiences, where expressing vulnerability felt unsafe.
One memory from my teenage years stands out: I was 12, sitting in class, feeling deep shame about my acne-covered face. I felt a profound desire to hide but never spoke about it, assuming no one would understand. This silence and internalization stayed with me into adulthood, creating layers of emotional and physical tension.
Through years of meditation, breathwork, and body-oriented practices, I’ve begun to process these layers. I’ve discovered how repressed emotions manifest physically, and I’ve worked to release them gradually. It’s an ongoing journey, but the weight has lifted, and my connection to myself has deepened.
The Two Paths to Healing Trauma – I prefer to take both!
Van der Kolk outlines two main approaches to healing trauma:
1. Bottom-Up Healing
• This approach focuses on the body and nervous system. Practices like yoga, breathwork, somatic therapy, psychedelics and rhythmic movement help regulate emotional states by addressing the physiological roots of trauma.
• My experiences with breathwork, Vipassana meditation, and somatic practices have been foundational in this area. They’ve allowed me to feel safe in my body, reconnect with sensations, and create space for emotions to move through me.
2. Top-Down Healing
• This method works through cognitive processes to regulate emotions and reframe past experiences. Talk therapy, mindfulness, and reflective practices engage the mind to bring clarity and reduce emotional overwhelm.
• My training in Compassionate Inquiry and the reflective practices I guide clients through align with this approach, helping individuals understand and reinterpret their inner narratives.
I prefer to take them both, engage actively in both paths of healing, maybe at some point down-up is better, and maybe another point top-down. But many people get stuck if they don’t do both actually in my experience.
The Role of Compassion and Connection
Healing trauma requires more than techniques—it calls for self-compassion and supportive relationships. One of the most transformative lessons I’ve learned is to approach emotions with curiosity rather than resistance. Instead of pushing away difficult feelings, I now allow them to surface, trusting that my body knows how to heal when given the chance.
Supportive environments and connections have also been vital. Moving away from unsupportive surroundings and building relationships where I felt seen and understood allowed me to take the first steps toward healing.